Oddities
by xev
Summary: Everyone's favorite dead man is acting strangly


I don't own any of the characters/scenes. This is not for profit/just for fun. Don't use this in an illegal way or the beans will release a tribe of rabid lawyers.  
  
Tia watched her son from the comfort of Joseph's arms. "Don't ever let this moment end." She commanded.  
  
Joseph smiled and pressed his lips to her ear, "As you command Empress."  
  
Tia smiled. She was so happy. Her son, Kesey, played with his favorite pet nearby. He saw his mother watching him and grinned even bigger then he had before. He ran to her and Tia went down on one knee to greet his embrace.  
  
"I love you Mommy."  
  
Tia closed her eyes. She heard Kesey whisper Mommy once more and she opened her eyes. She was no longer in the garden but in her son's room with him limp in her arms. She lifted her hand from his back. It was covered in blood. She could barely see through her tears. Kesey's body heat was slowly escaping him. She squeezed him tighter as if that could bring him back. She finally felt a presence behind her that she immediately recognized.  
  
"Daddy, how could you?"  
  
"It was necessary. He was not pure. You are also no longer pure my daughter. The infidel and your husband have both been dealt with, and now it is your turn."  
  
She barely heard her father snap his fingers through her sobs. She was then grabbed from behind and her dead son wrenched from her grasp…  
  
  
  
  
  
Tia's eyes were open in a flash of light and she suddenly remembered where she was. She was covered in sweat. Xev lay beside her. As a comfort to each other, they slept in the same bed. She rubbed her face to extinguish the last remaining presence of her dreams. They had actually decreased in frequency and intensity since coming aboard the Lexx three months ago.  
  
Stan had discovered a planet two days ago and they were in route. Tia got up carefully as not to disturb Xev. She continued on to the bridge.  
  
Stan was standing in the command center and looked at her as she came in. "Bad dreams again?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
  
"Not really."  
  
Stan took that as a good sign. A sign that she would no longer let these dreams run her life. Three months ago, she would have spent the entire day in bed, silent. 'I guess we all have a past we would rather forget,' he thought.  
  
"Are we getting any closer to that planet?"  
  
"We are almost there."  
  
"Great, no offence but I'm getting kinda sick of this ship."  
  
"I know what you mean."  
  
  
  
  
  
Later that day they had reached the planet. Xev, Stan and Tia stood on the bridge deciding what to do.  
  
"Why don't we wake Kai and go down there?" Xev asked.  
  
Stan was even in agreement. "Why not?"  
  
They were all startled by a voice behind them, "That will not be necessary."  
  
It was Kai.  
  
Xev got a disappointed look on her face, "Did 790 wake you again?"  
  
"Yes, but this time for a very serious reason. The Lexx has contracted some form of disease. You and Stan must go down to the planet until either Lexx or 790 can come up with a suitable antidote."  
  
Tia was confused, "Why not me?"  
  
"Your Dark Panther DNA will not allow you to get this disease, and someone will have to control the Lexx."  
  
They all nodded. Stan looked worried, "How is she supposed to get the key?"  
  
Xev looked at Stan. "Thodin passed the key without having to be killed, I would guess you could do the same. Just concentrate."  
  
Xev raised Tia's hand and Stan closed his eyes for a moment. His hand started to glow and the key was passed to Tia.  
  
"Wow," Tia whispered as she watched her hand.  
  
"I guess we better get going." Stan commented.  
  
Kai nodded as Stan and Xev moved towards the moth chamber.  
  
Tia looked at Kai after they had left, "What do I do now?"  
  
"You can rest while 790 comes up with a suitable antidote for Lexx."  
  
"How long do you think that will take?"  
  
"790 says it will not take long, as the disease is not that complicated."  
  
"Oh, ok."  
  
Kai watched her return to her chamber with an odd interest.  
  
  
  
Part2  
  
  
  
Kai walked to the bridge with 790 in one arm and a length of rope in the other.  
  
"What have you done with Xev?"  
  
"Xev went down to the planet with Stanley."  
  
"Why are you up here?"  
  
"They did not need me."  
  
"You should be protecting Xev from that degenerate Tweedle."  
  
"I believe Xev can protect herself."  
  
"FINE! I never get what I want. It's always 'do this, do that'. Well I'm sick of it. I'm not doing anything anymore unless it's for my love of loves."  
  
"That would be acceptable."  
  
Kai put 790 on the command center and headed for Xev and Tia's bed chamber.  
  
  
  
  
  
Kai was surprised and disappointed at the fact that Tia did not sleep as Xev did, naked. She was fully clothed as he came to the foot of the bed. She was stretched out on top of the covers. He watched her for ten minutes before continuing with his needs.  
  
  
  
  
  
Part3  
  
  
  
Kai lightly moved her arms so as not to wake her. He used the rope to secure her to a post on the bed. He made sure she was tightly bound before returning to the side of the bed. His hand lightly brushed her face, reveling in it's surprising softness. She didn't move or stir as he brought his hand slowly down her neck and onto her chest. As he crossed her breast she moaned and shifted slightly. He continued his exploration down her extremely tight stomach and across her hip. As his hand came in contact with her thigh her eyes fluttered softly open. It took her a moment to remember where she was. It was only then that she realized she was tied to the bed. Her eyes shifted form her bound hands to her captor.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"Do you have any idea how desirable you are?"  
  
Tia rolled her eyes. "I am not, and even if I was, you can't feel desire."  
  
He moved his hand slightly to her inner thigh and her eyes went wide as she realized he wasn't playing with her.  
  
"I can feel this. You're going to feel a number of things before I'm done."  
  
"Kai, Xev would appreciate this much more than I will, so why don't you go get her?"  
  
Kai brought his head down and seemed to breathe in as he moved his head over her body until he was face to face with Tia. "I guess it's something about the way you smell."  
  
Kai moved his lips until they were mere millimeters from hers. He froze there for a moment before he brought his lips against hers. She fought him, but his tongue was forced into her mouth. His tongue was not the only thing on Tia. His hands continued to explore her body with increasing ferocity.  
  
When he finally broke his kiss to lick her neck she started her protests.  
  
"Kai, I can't do this. Xev would never forgive me. She loves you. I don't think of you in that way. Please don't do this."  
  
"You will be begging me later, but not to stop."  
  
She squirmed away from him as she finally realized asking and logic would not help her. Her mind automatically started racing for ways to extricate herself from her current situation. She knew 790 would not help her. She could not break the rope that he had tied her with. If she let her Panther half take over, there was no knowing weather it would cooperate with Kai or fight him. She could not overpower him. She had no way out of this.  
  
Kai looked at her because she had moved. He leaned back for a second. Her momentary hope was dashed as he started removing his shirt. She noticed immediately the scars and metal apparatus on his chest. He moved to her feet and removed her boots, and then his. He then went back to her.  
  
His hands finally went to their final destination. She winced at his touch as the rest of her skin was immediately on fire. It was now taking every ounce of restraint she had to not scream as his fingers moved inside her. He looked deep in her eyes and then went back to kissing her. One of his hands left it's goal long enough to undo her top in the back.  
  
Suddenly, his hand both left her center to go to her arms. She planned to escape the second he undid her restraints, but no such luck. He unhooked one of her arms only so he could put her arms around him and secure her arms to the back of his pants at the top. He spread her legs to be around him and he sat up. She was dragged with him and pressed to his chest. She continued to fight her instincts as he continued his conquest of her body.  
  
Her head and spirit was a battle for control. Fireworks going on inside her blinded her eyes. Her skin was fighting her muscles as her muscles were pushing against Kai and her skin wanted to cling to him. The Dark Panther part of her was screaming for control. She could feel it's black presence growing. It clawed at every piece of her conscious mind. She forced her mind to concentrate on ways to get out of this.  
  
Kai's hands traced his way on her stiff as a post back, urging her to relax. He could feel her continued release of will. She was strong, but not strong enough. He had her on the precipice of complete surrender.  
  
"Beg me Tia. Beg me to release you. To end this conflict and take you over the edge. I can feel you quivering. Say it. Say you want it."  
  
At that moment ever fiber of her being wanted it. She wanted to cry out yes, but she fought it. Only then did she realize that Kai would let her go down on her own and then work her back up until she screamed and begged him to take her over the edge.  
  
It then hit her how to beat this. She only hoped she was right about 790.  
  
"If Xev found out about this she would never forgive either of us." She screamed.  
  
She then was overthrown by the Dark Panther part of her. She prayed that 790 had heard her.  
  
  
  
  
  
Part4  
  
790 had heard her and saw an opportunity. He used the squaker to call Xev.  
  
"Oh love muff-muffin, love muff-muffin!"  
  
"Yes 790, is the disease cured?"  
  
"What disease, my jewel of love?"  
  
'The disease Kai said Lexx had."  
  
"I don't know anything about that princess, but I do know that Kai is now in the process of screwing the brains our of the emperwhore."  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
He's screwing the emperwhore."  
  
"There must be something wrong with Kai. Stan and I will be up there in a moment."  
  
"No hurry oh object of my worship."  
  
  
  
  
  
With a roar of passion, Tia was no longer Tia. Her eyes turned a fiery silver. She dug her two-inch claws into Kai's lower back. He grunted and smiled.  
  
"That's it, give in."  
  
Tia was no longer capable of human speech as she pushed Kai over onto his back. Her teeth were immediately buried in his cheek. He pulled away slightly and scolded her.  
  
"Naughty Girl. Especially when it makes no difference." His cheek went back to exactly the way it was with a tingling of gold light.  
  
Her growls only seemed to excite him more as she tore at him with animal lust. Kai rolled her so he was on top and started her assent into ecstasy. She screamed in pure feline aggression at the fact that her hands were still tied. He could feel her build and build until she finally was at the precipice again. He slowly worked his hands down her body he finally found his goal. She shuttered against him as she jumped the cliff and collapsed against him. Kai started kissing her neck and massaging her thighs to start again.  
  
It was that moment that Xev and Stan walked in. Xev was carrying 790. They both froze as they saw what was happening.  
  
"Kai, what are you doing?"  
  
No answer came from the former assassin as Tia snarled at the new viewers. Stan and Xev noticed that Tia was not herself.  
  
"Tia?"  
  
A strangled reply finally came from the soldier, "Help me."  
  
Xev reached behind Kai and freed Tia's hands. Somehow, she was able to rise above her animal instincts and push away from him. He reached for Tia but Xev got in-between them. Stan grabbed Tia and attempted to calm her. The silver was slowly replaced by her usual brown as she started crying.  
  
Kai suddenly went limp and collapsed.  
  
Xev yelled for Stan. "We have to get him to the cryochamber!"  
  
  
  
  
  
"790, what have you found?"  
  
"In my scan of the dead man I have found that his protoblood was infected with an enzyme that is usually found in plants. It apparently took over his mind and made him do what he did to the Emperwhore."  
  
"Can you fix him?"  
  
"I can my love."  
  
"Do it."  
  
They were all silent while 790 fixed Kai. His eyes fluttered open.  
  
"Kai, do you remember what just happened? What is the last thing you remember?"  
  
"I remember returning to cryostasis after Stan informed me that he had found another planet."  
  
"SO you don't remember what happened with Tia?"  
  
Kai looked confused and her question was answered.  
  
Xev had already talked with Tia and Stan and decided that if he didn't remember, they would not tell him.  
  
Stan finally broke his silence, "How would he get an enzyme only found in pl…."  
  
Stan stopped as he remembered Lyekka. He but his hands over his eyes as he imagined asking the plant lady about what happened to Kai.  
  
Xev spoke, "Well, I guess, crisis over."  
  
Kai leaned back and the door slowly closed.  
  
  
  
Xev had been holding Tia for an hour now as she slept. Tia did not blame Kai for what he did. She understood what had happened. That is what disturbed Xev the most. Tia seemed to not even care about what had happened. Xev could not hold back thoughts that Tia was somehow slipping away from them. She seemed to be getting so much better, but after what had happened, Xev didn't know what would happen now. A tear rolled down Xev's face as she thought of her friend's internal conflict. If only she could help, but she knew that was impossible. She held Tia tight and hoped for the best. 


End file.
